Things are really hotting up

Work's good, the weather is finally drying out down here, and I'm slowly getting my carcass into shape. I've got all kinds of things to say about politics, etc, but screw that. We all have our opinions, and we all can't agree. Same with the enviroment. Oh, and shame on Subaru touting themselves as big enviromentalists. In order to avoid having to inmprove the mileage of their cars to avoid EPA fines, they somehow conned the EPa into letting their cars all be considered light trucks or SUVs. This way they meet minimum mileage requirements without doing anything about it. Way to go, just change your category, not improve the vehicle, thus it's still sucking down resources.

Other than that, I raced in Dallas a week ago at the State Fairgrounds. Pretty neat, as we were about the only people there, so it felt like a weird abandoned city. It was also crazy hot. Like over 100 in the sun, and no rain for the first time in weeks. I did two races, and somehow got 18th in both. Go figure. anyway, time to get in shape for the state championships this weekend in Lufkin. Hope I stay upright, then I'll worry about a good result. Here are somepics from last week.

There is no sense to be made

I know normally I go on about some inane stuff, or my bikes, or any other random item that gets me ruffled. But today I'm going to address something a bit serious.

Most of you know I was in the Army. I was a squad explosives expert, and a close quarter combat instructor/specialist. That meant that I did underwater demo, defused land mines, homemade bombs, unexploded shells, anything that could go boom. I also left them behind when it was needed. I also was good at hand to hand combat, so much so it was my job to make sure my squad was as good as me.

I can't make sense of what I did, but I think about it every now and then. Of my squad, I'm the only living member. All the others (13) were killed in action. I see what goes on right now, and again , realize there's no making sense of that, either. Many good people are maimed or killed as we speak, just as when I was in.

My father told me "when someone has something someone else wants, there will be war". It's that simple. Really. Except that there's no reason, in any sense of the word, so unreasonable acts follow. It's not a political party thing, as Clinton was President when I served, and we were sent to fight myriad dirty little wars.
I don't know why we went where we did. My absolute best friend in the Army died in my arms, but I don't know the reason. I literally tried to put him back together.

For all the good missions, we had horrible ones, fraught with misinformation and logistical screwups. I had wounded buddies we couldn't get to in time, and we heard them kill themselves to avoid capture. I remember the fear that gripped me momentarily when our outpost was under attack, and we couldn't shoot the enemy fast enough, and then my mind screamed at me "DON"T PANIC, THAT"S HOW PEOPLE DIE!!!!!". At that moment, my mind morphed into a hyperprocessor.

What am I saying? Not totally sure, other than there is no logical explanation to a logical mind for what's going on now. I've got to live with these memories, and scores of others. I've taken lives from a distance, up close and personal, and I can't always wrap my mind around it.

I'm not scarred. Not physically, and sometimes I think it'd be easier to explain all this to myself if I were.

UPS + bike = bad day

My bike arrived Friday, and I was all excited. Until I saw the end of the box. Let's just say that I'm waiting for a call from a UPS claims person to inspect my bike. The frame and fork have some structural issues, as in it may just snap while I ride it.

So if you need to send something really near and dear to your heart, drive it yourself. Considering how tough carbon fiber is, and that it was wrapped in bubble wrap, carefully placed in the box (remember, I do this for work quite often) and had gaps filled with other things to make sure the contents wouldn't shift, it amazes me that they actually knocked it out of alignment. Plus chipped the carbon all the way through clear coat, lettering, into the weave.

Right now, UPS is dangerously close to being on my blacklist, which individually isn't too big a deal, but lots of their business is from cyclists. We all talk to each other. Many of us have websites. You get the idea. Besides, I insured my bike. I expect the full amount it's insured for. This ought to be fun.

Back in the Black

Well, we are finally back from vacation. It was really good, everyone was nice to my wife, the weather was crazy muggy and mostly good, and I had fun. Other than the fun of flying to and from, but that's another post entirely.

I'll spare the details, but I saw my nephew for the first time, all my family was together, we played wiffle ball, saw everyone we needed to, and ate all the time. I gained almost 8 pounds!

As for my bike, I raced Memorial Day, and I got 10th, 28th, 33rd, and 31st respectively in my races. Considering I was there at 720, and my last race fired off at 2, and it was sunny hot and humid, I think I did ok. A few tactical errors, but that's life. I was able to ride some up in Lake Placid, too, but not nearly as much as I wanted to. Maybe next time.

So, that's about it. Time to put my bike back together when it gets here, and start getting into shape again. I feel like I've lost a whole season, but it's not even half over yet. There's still time.

Courage

I'm packing to go away for a while. See the relatives, do some racing, etc. Four crits in a day. I hope I don't embarass myself. Especially since my parents will be there.

So while I was packing I was thinking of the meaning of Memorial Day weekend. It's a time to reflect and thank those who gave their lives for us, and had the courage to do so. But what other types of courage are there? Who's courageous?

Lance is courageous, he fought cancer and many other battles and won. But my vote goes to Michael J Fox. He's battling a disease which as of yet has no cure, he is all there mentally, but he's helpless as he sees himself slipping away. Yet he keeps working when he can, generating awareness, fundraising. That's courage. Facing certain death, barring a miracle, and still fighting with all you have.

Davis Phinney is another. I saw an interview with him about a month or so ago after he did a fundraiser in Central Park. My first impression was how sad it was to see him fighting to control his head and speech and arms. Then I realized it wasn't sad, it was great on an epic scale. He was on national tv, laying it all out there, no hiding, no fear of what people would think. Courage.

All these guys have is hope, and they refuse to let it go. I look at these individuals and I think "Wow, I really don't have any problems, do I?". What am I whining about? Michael J Fox and Davis Phinney are leading by example, without much realistic hope of being cured, and that's courageous.

I once said "There's a fine line between courage and stupidity, and I often straddle it." Maybe that's true, maybe not. I'm here today because of the courage and selflessness of others. Memorial Day is about my friends I'll never see again for me. It used to be a day off, time for fun, but it's personal now. At some point I'll take a few minutes for my memories.

Happy Memorial Day, take a second to reflect on what it's all about, and enjoy what that has brought you.

Throttling down

I know it's been some time. I needed a break to deal with Jasper and to try and catch up. It might be some time before I post again. I need to get ready for a trip, try to get in good enough shape to salvage something from this season, and in general live again.

I hope all of you have a great and safe Memorial Day weekend. Take a minute to think of those who gave their lives so we could live ours. It's not a lot to ask. I have a few friends I'll be thinking of. Nothing's worse than doing something for your fellow man and being forgotten. Let's make sure that doesn't occur.

Goodbye, Big Fuzzy

I learned today that my cat Jasper, whom I left with my brother's family in NY, died this past weekend. He was only five, and I was really excited to see him in a month when we went up. I'll find some pics. His sister (biological, even) isn't sure what to do, as she's always been with him since they were born.

Big Fuzzy was what I called him, and he's now in heaven. We shared some of the thoughest times of my life together, and he was always there, ready to purr, drool, and snuggle. Say a prayer for both of them, and for my nieces, brother, sister in law, parents, wife and myself. I'm devastated, to put it mildly. We all are.

Most of all I can recall the fun we had, and his silly antics. I'll miss you, Big Fuzzy. Love, Dad

The Stars at Night

Yes, the song "Deep In The Heart of Texas" is true. At over 5000 ft and with no artificial light to interfere, the night sky was amazing in Ft. Davis. So that was the amazing part. Well, besides the scenery, the hotel, the food, the prices, and the sheer epicness (is that a word?) of the race. More amazing is that I finished.

Let's just say that I'm happy to have finished, especially after the hillclimb Saturday. I rode a mediocre time trail in the morning, but with the winds and some other things, didn't do too badly. That afternoon we rode the 16 miles from Ft Davis to Mt Locke, the UT observatory. Which is at an altitude of 6790 ft. Thin air, yes. 40 mph gusts, yes. Me struggling due to the extra weight I'm still carrying. Oh, yeah.

Somehow I got up the road, which is crazy steep. I finished 53rd out of 57, I think. All I could do was rest up and hope the road race Sunday would be better. It wasn't. A little over 70 miles, and we gained over 6000 ft of elevation. I'm no climber on my best day, so this was a tough day.

I hung on for the first 40 miles, then got popped off the back. The next 30 miles were spent riding a race of survival. I finished second to last on the stage, and ended up last in overall position for final results at 49th. However, the other guys quit or didn't even start the race. So I'm happy I toughed it out, even if it was the worst I ever felt on a bike and after the race was over.

The rest of the weekend was great, and I'd love to go back. It's really pretty out there, really isolated, and unique. This weekend we saw everything. Wild hogs, skunks, impalas, javalinas, hawks, roadrunners, mountain goats, wild turkeys, the list goes on. Also, staying at the Indian Lodge was quite the find. Check it out: http://www.tpwd.state.tx.us/spdest/findadest/parks/indian_lodge/

It's immaculate, friendly, unique, beautiful, and has a neat history. I really want to go back. My friend Trav and his dad who went with me were really impressed. Trav got 25th overall, I think. Maybe 20th. So, next year, I'll go back. I'll also go back in much better shape, because I never want to suffer like that again.

Weighing In

The Va Tech shootings are a tragedy. I'm pissed the media are giving so much coverage to it, for it just feeds another psychotic mind out there. that mind now thinks it'll have to top this to get noticed. Instead of giving the event dignity, the media has given it celebrity. But we love tabloids in this country, and this is more of the tabloid mentality.

I feel bad, but a little angry. Bad for the students, angry for the fact that they'll get all the counseling they need, while we as a country can't provide basic mental services for our armed forces. Not much has changed since I was in, and that's another American tragedy.

There's now the gun control debate. Face it folks, if a criminal wants a gun, he'll get one. With as deranged as this individual was, he'd have gotten one eventually. Ask the Brits, they have crazy gun control and the criminals still have them.

I'll address the matter that these students thought they were safe, and thus it was a more traumatic experience. Fair enough. Yet we should all know we're not safe anywhere. Call it the 6th sense of combat that never left me, but I'm always looking, scanning, listening. You should be, too. Play the "what looks out of place game" sometime, it's amazing how much you really can observe.

I'm off to Ft Davis in the mountains for a race tomorrow, so have a good weekend. I hope that all the students get the help they need and recover quickly. We should also hope that our armed forces should be so lucky.

Might as well be speaking Chinese...

Maybe you've heard: China is banning bad manners, spitting, and unintelligible English in preparation for the Beijing Olympics. So I guess the US will be leaving many athletes home...oh, did I say that? Out loud?

It's an effort to present a better public image to the world, and to some extent, it's a laudable effort. Trying to get taxi drivers to at least know some English to help with the influx of fans, hoping businesses will have signs that don't confound people. But there's a problem, and it's that the businesses were given strict guidelines for their signage (a stack of regs that weigh about 2 lbs) but aren't following them. Here are some examples:

A store selling tobacco products advertises: "An Excellent Winding Smoke."

On a billboard, this mysterious message: "Shangri-La is in you mind, but your Buffalo is not." Maybe we don't want more Chinese signs translated. Yet, it's not just the private sector. Look at this gem from the Beijing airport:

On the floor at Beijing's Capital Airport, a sign reads: "Careful Landslip Attention Security." People have the nerve to say our airport security is out to lunch? Or this one, that I'm not sure what it means:

In an elevator, parents are warned: "Please lead your child to tare the life." tare weight is an empty shipping container's weight, maybe the Chinese government is worried the youth of China is leading an empty life? Yet all is not lost. As always, the Chinese governement, that benign body of bureaucracy, has selected an eminently qualified person in the form of Liu Yang, who heads the "Beijing Speaks Foreign Languages Program" for the city government. In all their wisdom, the Chinese have selected someone to whom English isn't their primary language.

Of course, as the interview went on, I began thinking I was mistaken, especially after reading this statement: "We will pass the message on to authorities in the advertising sector," Liu said. "If English translation is needed it must be subject to the standards set forth in the regulations." Sounds like any English speaking lawyer to me. My confidence restored, I continued.

Much like a Honeymooner's episode, though, you just know what's coming. Somewhere, our Ralph, like Liu, despite all the good intentions, will faceplant into the pavement. And so it began with this quote.

"In the future when we set up new signs in public places in English, we hope all these standards will be followed to avoid more additional mistakes." More additional mistakes? Hello, can I please have the Government Department of Redundancy Department? This is who the Chinese have in charge of the program? It gets worse, as like any good $19.95 TV offer, there's more.

Beijing has 15 million residents, of which supposedly 5 million speak English. Liu backs this up by stating many fall into "low level" English. What exactly is that? According to Liu, this:

"They can have very simply conversations, like: `Who am I? Where am I going?"' Very simply put, Liu, you might be going soon, too. Maybe the US will be able to send all it's athletes, after all. They might even have some, like the basketball team, teach some English. How much worse can it get?

Some of this post consists of quotes from an AP article. No author was listed, otherwise I'd have gladly given credit for the inspiration.

I think I see the end of the tunnel, or is it an approaching train?

Been a bit, it seems. Not much to relay. I did forget to mention that all Subaru's sold in the US are made up by Lafayette, IN, right off I65. Somehow I've survived to this point, but not sure how.

It's interesting when you take a moment to look at your life, and you see how much is really going on. Right now I'm working more than I have in a long time, (another story entirely), trying to get my hair back to a normal color (ask my wife, I just sat there...), work on taxes, get ready for some racing this weekend, and try to figure out our trip logistics when we go back to the northeast in a little over a month.

How do we not go insane? But we don't, and that's the cool thing. Well, to add to all this, today I have a sore nose, throat and ears, plus I ache all over. Guess I'll go eat something and rest. So I can make up for the lost time today by being sick...

Damn it I'm an American! No you're not! No YOU'RE not!

Well, you asked for it, and I'm finally delivering. I said if you wanted to buy American in the auto industry, you might as well buy a Toyota. Straight from my favorite source of auto info with factual content, Consumer Reports, here's the skinny.

Ford like to say "Red, White and Bold", but they along with GM are lowering the use of parts made in America and Canada. More and more they are utilizing their factories in India, Mexico, and the Orient. So, while 90% of a Toyota Sienna is made in the US and Canada, only 65% of the all American Mustang is made here. Both are assembled in the US, unlike the Chevy Avalanche and Ford Fusion, which are totally born in Mexico. "American Revolution", my ass, Chevy!!!

Most BMWs are built in South Carolina, and a few Mercedes are built in Alabama. So, what makes an American car? Saab 9-3s are all built in the US. Saab is owned by GM. Is it an American car? Maybe. Or are they immigrant cars? Aston Martin and Jaguar: British built, but Ford owned. Daimler Chrysler, well I don't even think they know who's running the show.

This is just like the immigration debate, isn't it? Makes you wonder.

Heck, then we can move onto auto advertising. "Fully indepenent front suspension". Big deal. Last time a car had a beamfront axle was the 30's, folks. Hell, even the Edsel had independent front suspension. Basically, every car commercial states a car has fuel injection (just using the company specific terms) independent suspension, and an engine. Most people other than those of us who've worked on cars really care or know what the terms mean. If the car starts, runs, gets decent mileage and does what you bought it to do well, that's good enough. Or is it?

Well, I tried

http://cyclepics.smugmug.com/gallery/2593471#136696606-L-LB
http://cyclepics.smugmug.com/gallery/2593471#136696955-L-LB

Here are two pics of me finishing Stage 1 of the Fayetteville Stage Race this past weekend. I finished. The first day I was lying in about 60th overall after the road race and time trial. I suffered, but it's mostly from a lack of fitness. Also that pesky crash isn't totally healed.

I'm the guy getting pipped at the line with the red and yellow shoes. Normally I'd win a sprint like this, but since I'm just getting used to standing on the bike, I did a seated sprint. Following this stage we had a time trial where each of us goes one at a time to see who can cover the course the fastest. Again, I did ok, but I have much more work to do.

Sunday I was riding just to survive, but about halfway through I completely fell apart. I'll be looking at my preparation for future races. Plus I hit a really hard bump on the road and my left shoulder (which is a bit wonky since the crash, droops a little) popped out, and I wasn't able to hold onto the top of the handlebars when I had to climb. So I thought of bagging it, but stuck it out to be the last official finisher on the stage. Turns out, I was the last official finisher overall, but of 77 starters, I ended up 49th. So it was a victory just in finishing.

Now I have quite a bit of time to get in shape for my next races in April, so let's hope I actually have something worth writing about in that department next time.

tears

I finally got on my bike today. It was bittersweet. My hip feels better, but is still tender. Oddly enough, it didn't hurt at all riding, in fact it felt the best it has since the crash. It's my chest, especially my left side and peck. I can't stand and pedal easily. I can do it, but it hurts so much I had some tears coming out.

So, what does this mean? Nothing really, except that I'll have to adapt my riding style until my chest stops phoning it in. And I'm getting sick of those bills, by the way, chest. Just so you know. I'm hoping to race in a week.

I was emotional because today I finally fought the crash demons (who are a super secret division of Squirrel Interpol) and won. I was nervous for the first few miles. Last thing I need to be is nervous on the bike, it just invites another crash. Without asking the host (me) if it's ok. So the nerves settled down, and I had a nice ride from Libery Hill through Bertram and Oatmeal back to Liberty Hill.

I rode ok, actually better than I thought I would. I just hope I can get some good miles in my legs and heal some more. But we'll see. I have a history of surprising people and myself on occasion when the odds are long. Next weekend is a stage race. first race of the year was a stage race and I did much better than I thought I would. Let's see if I can improve on that.

Oh, and if you want to buy an american vehicle, buy a Toyota, not GM. Toyota, Honda and a few other "Foreign" brands actually are assembled here and use higher percentages of parts made in the US. It's a forthcoming post with details.

Squirrels and Beavers

Well, since I alluded to some squirrels possibly skulking about in my last post, I guess I ought to come clean. Let me just say that squirrels are the smartest fuzzy ones out there, except beavers in my opinion. Beavers have advanced engineering degrees for water systems. Squirrels are the countermeasures experts.

It all happened in 2004 on my way to a bike race. I ran over a squirrel with my car just inside the MA line. My teammate Scott looked at me we just kind of shrugged our shoulders. Not much we could do. During the race, another squirrel ran out and I happened to be the one who ran him over and finished him off. Again, not much I could do, but I'm sure I was now being watched.

On the way home, I mentioned to Scott that "one more and I'd have a hat trick", and not more than a mile from NY I ran over another squirrel. Hat trick, indeed. At that moment I'm positive the squirrel version of Interpol was tracking my every move. I was definitely a menance to their existence. Later that summer, I had another hat trick, but this time it was a robin into my windshield, a chipmunk during the race (I wasn't the only one to hit him but I did end his misery), and of all things, a squirrel a block from my home. If three in a day weren't enough to get me on the most wanted list, this was.

Since then, I've kept a low profile, tried to be nice to squirrels, and shrugged off when nuts and branches would come down at me from above. But deep in my mind I knew. I knew that the squirrels were on to me. I knew that they were firing warning shots across my bow. I knew the squirrels in white lab coats were in the back room, monitoring my every move, looking for a routine, calculating revenge, justice and retribution. They analyzed my bike, the physics of the whole thing. They knew I have a predisposition to falling up stairs, so that wasn't a good plan. Gravity was their friend, except the time I greased the sheperd's hook one winter in my parent's backyard. (The bird feeder was for the birds, after all.)

It took almost three years. When I moved to Kerhonkson I threw them off, and they had to regroup. Then the move to TX really caught them by surprise. Yet squirrels are resourceful. They came up with another plan. And they knew two things about me.
1) I ride my bike all over the place.
2) I've missed Einstein's Bagels since 99 when I moved from Indianapolis to NY.

With those seemingly incogruous pieces of information they formulated a plan. Near Einstein's were oak trees shedding acorns. By calculating my path, they could arrange the acorns and thus, control my trajectory. Into the parked car. Very clever. They knew from profiling that I'd head down to the end of the lot with the traffic light, since I always ride like I'm on a motorcycle in traffic.

It worked perfectly. I'm not sure if it was severe enough a sentence to absolve me of all the times I let my dog out to chase the squirrels from the bird feeders, or the snowballs I threw at them to keep them away, or the grease, but I sure hope so. Otherwise, the squirrels will be the end of me.

I don't want to be near a 3rd time

I crashed again today. After my morning ride I went to Einstein's to get a bagel for my wife and myself. Riding through the parking lot, my bike went right, brushed a curb, hit the left pedal, gave me hope, then slid sideways out from under me. Next thing I know I'm on the deck and under a parked car. Moaning. Feeling like I was going to throw up.

I sat up, took off my helmet (split in 4 places) and tried to collect my thoughts. They were still spinning past my brain. A few people checked on me, but I called my wife, and she picked me up. After going to work for half the day, I went for x-rays. I may have fractured my hip. It sure feels like it. Plus my entire left side of my torso is killing me. Oh happy day.

So, no racing this weekend. But I'll be home and Lost and I can spend some time together, which is very rare. I'm supposed to stay off the bike for a week. Blah.

I might have been felled by some acorns. Or some squirrels in white lab coats. Squirrels and I have history, and after almost 3 years on the run they may have found me...

Turning

Everything turns somehow. Even stationary objects move a little. Which explains how I somehow get things done. I did race again Sunday at Pace Bend Park on Lake Travis. I did much better, except about 2 miles from the line (if that) my legs phoned it in. so again I finished 58th. How's that for consistency?

I am still very tired from the weekend, but tomorrow I'll ride for a bit and get some errands done. Funny, but all this stuff I need to do really isn't important in the big picture. Even my cycling isn't a huge deal. To me it is, but that's about it. And that's my point.

What is important? Really? It's all about the circles around us, and how much different things overlap in them. Bottom line, take away cycling and the world won't stop. But my world would. So I immerse myself in my world. I taped every minute of the Tour of California, and got my motivation back. I read with disbelief the transcript of Jan Ullrich's retirement press conference. I feel George Hincapie's pain from his broken wrist, and how that little fall a few days ago may cost him his spring campaign. A campaign that may have included his first major spring classics (certain races are classics due to difficulty, length, and how long the races have been around) win.

So here I sit, tired, a little saddened by events in my world, but happy to be in it. See you on the road.

It's a long post, but the most important part is at the end

Ok, so I raced today, or at least showed up. With the wind, my lack of fitness (but I have lost 8 pounds) and having crashed yesterday, I didn't do too badly. Not sure how badly it was, but at least I finished when many quit. Now I just need to get out and ride myslef into shape, but another race looms tomorrow. I hope to do better.

On the way to and from Walburg, I used the new toll road to get to I35 from Mopac. Growing up in the northeast, land of tolls, I feel 75 cents each way for a more direct and less congested route was a steal. If you live in TX, use these roads. It's so much easier.

Now, here's something that strikes my heart. It's an article about a helicopter pilot in Viet Nam who finally is to get the Congressional Medal of Honor for a battle he was part of in 1965. Without him and his company, the 1st Cavalry's 1st Battalion, 7th Cavalry Regiment would have been wiped off the earth. It's the battle the book We Were Soldiers Once...and Young and subsequent movie were based on.

All chopper pilots are heroes in the Army. As opposed to the guys on the ground, the pilots are going through a maelstrom of fire repeatedly, instead of just once. Plus, a chopper is a prime target. I owe my life to the pilots we had assigned to us, as they landed where they shouldn't or couldn't to get us out of trouble. Once, a pilot told me after we got back that his bird was"just a huge tree trimmer" when he saw me staring at leaves and branches hanging off it.

Never once did they refuse to come in, even when we told them the landing zone was too hot. Several times they even did low passes to draw fire so we could move to a safer position. I'm not sure if they were fearless or insane, as there's a fine line there, but they used to look at us SF guys and say we were crazy, and the feeling was mutual.

I've recounted a few experiences here of mine, but I'd not be able to do it without our pilots. I know that not everyone agrees with the wars right now, and I don't need to know your feelings. I just hope we drop our opinions and think of these brave guys. They deserve a lot more credit than they get. So to Major Bruce Crandall, I'm so happy you are finally recognized. Without men like you, many more of us wouldn't be here to congratulate you, and you have most hearfelt thanks.

Read the item here:http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070224/ap_on_re_us/vietnam_valor

New, new all so new!

Well, it's a new season, I have a new team kit (uniform to the rest of the world), and new hope that I won't be able to be called Tubbo much longer. That being said, I still have about 19lbs to go. So with all this newness, what is it exactly?

I've finally found my motivation, I'm beginning to get some overdue projects done on my bikes, and I'm now an uncle for the 4th time. So, since my new nephew is in New England, I'm hoping to get up and see him and my other relatives sometime in the not too distant future.

As for my racing, this weekend I have 2 more races, so we'll see how that goes. I did have the pleasure of riding out in Bastrop State Park again this past Tuesday. Perfect day at the perfect place to ride. No one to bother you, pretty as can be.

Other than that, I have no thoughts, other than I hope the Police are going to play somewhere nearby on tour.

Grammys and other white fluff

So we watched the Grammys while eating dinner (our 7 month anniversary) and though entertaining, that was it at best. The program seemed really disjointed, presenters seemed unprepared, jokes were not funny, and the set was pretty lackluster. That being said, a few performances were decent, but I'm glad I didn't waste time or money to attend if I had the option.

Add to this some of the nominees were weak, or in one case, the I said "That's it? That's who they nominated?" when I could have named several more diverse and deserving artists. As well as the categories not really matching up to the nominess (anyone remember Jethro Tull winning Best Heavy Metal Album when Metallica was one of the other nominees? I mean, Tull is a flute playing trout farmer in Scotland!!! Dude can rock, as I saw him in concert that year, but...) in some instances. Lastly, it seems a new category pops up every year. Almost like an "Everyone gets a ribbon for participating" mentality. Yargh!!

On to the other big news to me. Anyone paying attention to the Lake Effect snow in upstate NY? Pretty cool, in a way. It's also neat to see places on the news that I used to frequent, like the bakery in Oswego, etc. That being said, shoot me if I ever mention I want to move into the Lake Effect area of NY. Where I'm from has gotten about an inch all year. Not over 10 feet in a week. Amazing how the weather can be so different a mere 4 hour drive apart. Kind of like TX.

With that crazy transition, I'm going to be racing all over TX this year. I'm most excited about a stage race in FT Davis, as it's at almost a mile high to start, and we're going to climb to the highest point in TX on the second stage, some 9780 ft high observatory. I think it's called MT Locke. I'll have to check. And with that, I need to check out of here and get on my bike in the dampness.

Another diatribe

Anna Nicole is dead. It's a shame when anyone dies, even if it's someone we love to hate. What kills me is the comparisons to Marilyn Monroe and Jayne Mansfield. There are none, other than looks. Marilyn might have been messed up, but she was at least talented. Watch Bus Stop.

Jayne was super smart (163 IQ) played violin and piano well enough to have made a living doing it, spoke 6 languages, and could act. Her comedic talents were really good, and in her more obscure drama parts (I say obscure becuase she was seriously acting in them, not oozing sex) like The Wayward Bus, she was excellent.

Anna Nicole didn't have any talent, except for self publicity, one she did share with Jayne Mansfield. So, let her rest in peace, hope her child has a life without insane influence, and stop the comparisons. All three need a break.

Yow!!!

Well, things are picking up already. Where to start? Well, the Colts finally won a Superbowl, so I'm very happy. I like Peyton Manning and the Colts for various reasons. One, I lived in Indy for 6 years, and was there for Peyton's rookie season and I think a few more. I'm not that much a football fan for specifics. Two, the Colts play football and that's it. It's a rare day wgen you hear about a Colt getting in trouble or calling attention to himself off the field. They show up, they play, you don't hear about them until the following week. True professionals.

Rumor has it it's cold in my homeland of NY. However, being it's late in the season, it won't last too long. February is always one of the coldest months where I'm from. I'm glad I moved to TX.

I did my first race of the season this past weekend. Well, I was there. With totally inadequate preparation I was dropped from the road race Saturday, so I got something like 67th out of 85. Sunday there was a 3.2 mile time trial, which is where we go 1 at a time every 30 seconds to see who can cover the course the fastest. Usually it's my speciality. OF course, usually I have more miles in my legs, and I don't get a flat 7 minutes before my start time. Luckily the guy parked next to me had a spare tube (I forgot to bring some) so I was able to compete. I got 46th. Respectable.

Lastly I had to go to a park at Canyon Lake where we had another race on a 2.1 mile circuit. 40 minutes to suffer. Oddly enough, I felt the best of the weekend there. I stayed in the lead group for the whole race, and on the last lap, knowing I had no sprint (another speciality of mine) I backed off a slight bit to stay out of trouble. Good thing, too, as about 9 guys tangled right after the last corner. I finished 30th out of about 75 starters. Over 30 quit the race it was so fast.

So now I'm trying to get myself in some shape for my next race in a few weeks. Plus work on my tan (which never faded from last yeartoo much) with all it's funky lines. Yesterday I rode to San Marcos from south Austin, today I'm hoping to go to Bastrop state forest once my laundry is done.

Empty

We've all had it. That empty feeling, even at times when we should feel fulfilled. Like experiencing an anticlimax. Case in point: the vintage car racing team I was on was better in the points each year in the championship. When we won it, we kind of looked at each other like"umm, well, now what?".

For the first time in quite some time, I'm not feeling empty. At all. It's been an adjustment. My job is good, I like everyone I work with, being married is everything it's supposed to be, and it feels like you've accomplished something. My racing is about to start, so Tubbo here is definitely on a quest to return to form.

But I was watching the History channel (like usual) and got that empty feeling again. It stems from my army days, and I understand it. In some ways I miss it, in other ways I'm glad it's over, and there are times when I wish it never happened at all so it won't torment me.

I won't bore or torture you with details, and I'm not sure my post is all that cohesive today. I guess I'm hoping none of you ever has to feel that emptiness. I'll just tell you that I have many friends whom I'll never see again and that I miss them terribly. If you have people who are close to you, let them know it, for the emptiness I feel is from not telling them, and I'll never have the oppurtunity to.

A good buddy of mine was shot while we were running across a village square to get a better defensive position. I dove down to grab him and try to give some first aid. While others of my squad did the best they could to protect us, I realized there was nothing I could do. He looked at me and said "it's ok, it's ok, I know you tried".

He was so at peace, but it doesn't fill the hole left.

Here's some excitement

So, the other day I was with my lovely wife house/pet sitting and where we were had a scale in the bathroom. I love scales, as well as flashlights and a myriad of other mostly workaday items. Well, we don't have a scale. So you guessed it, I hopped on. You'd think my weight at about 6 feet and being a cyclist would be low. How little you know...

First, I hadn't ridden too much since early December. Of course, I kept eating. Well, since the suspense is well, not really there, I'll let you hear it. I weighed 195 lbs!!!! Without shoes! I knew getting married and eating in Austin would be a challenge to keep off the weight, but ouch!! I weighed 168 when I left NY. I weighed about 170 when I arrived here.

So, here's the news. I'm determined to get down to my racing weight again. Why do you care? Actually, you don't have to. The genius (if it can be called that) is that since I put this info out in public, I'll be motivated to work at it. What if someone meets me and goes, hmmm, "Yo tubbo, I thought you were trying to lose weight like your blog said."? This is assuming anyone actually
A) Reads my blog
B) Meets me in person. Pretty unlikely. However, my job is expecting to see me do better than last year. Well, everyone is bugging me about it, not like my job depends on it or anything.

So, in the spirit of trying to get into race shape, I rode almost 30 miles today. This was actually the shortest first ride of a year in my life, however I did alter my position (how high the seat is, handlebar height, etc) so that took some time and I had to take it easy while my body adjusts.

Since I don't do anything half heartedly, I'm also signed up for the Tour of New Braunfels stage race in a week. Three races in 2 days. That's right, I'm going to race myself into shape. Actually, I'm using it as a basis to see what I need to work on (everything) and to set a benchmark.

Lastly, I hope everyone's new year is starting off well. So far I'm loving it.

Good God, it's been that long??!!??

Whoa ho yo ho yikes!!! I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted. Well, it's one of those dichotomy days. Lots to talk about but not a lot has happened. Let me pontificate. Well, I'm not quite the pope, but who doesn't love that word?

I was supposed to race this past Saturday. I didn't for various reasons. Odd part is the fact I haven't even ridden my road bike since last Novemeber wasn't the main one. You know those watershed moments in life when you realize you don't do something for adult reasons? This was one. Like not gettting plastered because it takes too much out of you, not because you don't have the money to. bottom line is that I had been sick, didn't want to risk the drive in case the race was called off, and well, it's a long season.

So, that brings me to the next topic of this post: Ice Storm '07. Come on, folks!! It wasn't much to talk about, unless you're not used to it, which is the case down here. Crag and I are in agreement about "real" winters. (Hope all is well with you, my friend.) Now Belle has some cool pics on her blog, and she's from down here, so it's cool to see the differing perspectives. I had Mon and Tue off, then spent most of Wed getting the store I work at safe for business knocking ice off the awnings, de-icing the sidewalks, etc.

Speaking of making things safe, I'm going to give a quick pointer to TXDOT. You took a sizeable chunk of change to build elevated roadways and toll roads. Hate to say it, but I think it's time you invest in the proper equipment to keep these roads open no matter what. To have these roads shut down for three to four days due to some ice is unacceptable. It's simple physics. Cold rain cools the structure, some airflow under the structure cools it to below freezing, and you have a bad day. Those yellow "Watch for ice on bridges" signs aren't going to cut it anymore. Austin, you want to be a top running city, you got to be one across the board.

Since I'm on a crazy roll here, how about those Presidential hopefuls? Personally, I think Hillary running isn't going to be a good thing. IF it comes down to her and the guy from IL, (Obama?) I think the Dems have lost the South. I say that because he's not white, and she's, well, a she, and from NY now. Let's be honest, most people in this country don't like much about NY (though you'd love me if you met me, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!) so IF the Republicans have the brains to get a moderate, articulate candidate on the ballot, I feel many Democrats and swing voters would vote Republican. Most likely they'd consider it the least of the evils.

Hmm, what else to talk about? Oh, the aftermath of the storm. Sat I dropped off my lovely wife to work at 11 at Barton Creek. I then decided to go to the Central location of my job at Lamar and Barton Springs RD, no too far. I saw a friend, checked out some things, and headed on over to a hobby shop on Lamar. By the time I left the hobby shop, it was after 3. What? How?

I ended up meeting two guys named Mike and Van. All three of us are into trains and cars, so we were talking about those things, plus they happen to be teachers. I wanted to be a teacher for a long time, but gladly and wisely changed course. My father retired from teaching after over 30 years, and my mom had been one for awhile, and Van and Mike and I compared teaching in TX to NY. It was a really neat discussion about how society has changed, and with that the role of teachers and schools has, too. None for the better, also.

Now for the big news. I weighed myself the other day. I was huge!! Like 195!!! Where in the hell did all that weight come from? How am I supposed to race this year? I was 168 in June when I moved here. Guess I need to literally dust off my road bike...

Almost done with this marathon of posting. Shortly I'll put up two links on this here blog. Both are cycling related. Both are for charity rides. One is for a coworker and riding pal of mine. She's doing a ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles to raise money for AIDS. It's a great cause, and she's really cool and working really hard to do it.

The other link will be for a blogging friend of mine who keeps track of weekly mileage for a large group of us. He had bariatric surgery and has lost huge amounts of weight through cycling and diet. If he hadn't, he'd be dead, according to him. Well, he's doing a diabetes fund raising ride. He's come a long way, so it'd be cool if we could support him, too.

Both of these are worthy causes, and both people are to be commended for their initiative and determination. Let's try to make their only concern getting in shape to complete the rides.

New Year, same thoughts

Well, 2007 has arrived. We all try to make the new year different/better than previous editions, but by the 11th, we fall back into the same ruts. Mostly. But no need to focus on that here. I'm happy to even see 2007.

I work at a bike shop, and it's great. Most of our clientele is really cool, with a few brainless wonders. But even on my worst day, I'm happy to be there. I may whine sometimes and complain about how I wish something was different. Most times I mean it, but forget that my feelings are really pretty trivial. Let's look at the facts, and yes, I'm going to confuse you with them. Or at least myself.

First, I've beaten death several times in my life. Twice with illness, quite a few times in the army. I have a beautiful and loving wife who tolerates my lunacy. My parents and I get along pretty well, as well as my brother and sister and I. I have a job, that while it doesn't pay as well as others I could probably hold, is a short commute and I love. I have great memories of childhood, and of great friends I lost in the army.

So, what do I resolve to do differently in 2007? Well, try to be a bit more tolerant sometimes, not take people for granted, and try to not forget those who aren't here anymore. Other than that, I'd like to lose the 20 pounds I've gained since June.

Take the time to appreciate your life and everything around you. It won't always be the same, but it'll always be yours. Happy New Year!!!!

Happy New Year

Ok, so not much to write about. Work, holidyas, that's it. Went for a ride today and am now feeling it. Too much. But I need to get my ass in gear since on 1/20 I'm going to be up in Copperas Cove, and if I don't get in some semblance of shape, I'll be pissed at myself.

I hope everyone had a great new year and things are starting off well for all you. Don't worry, I'll be posting more in the near future as soon as things go back to "normal".

A Break

That's right. I'm taking a break. I've been slowly doing things today to get ready for the holidays, but I needed a break, and here I am. The weather is damp and a cool, but I still think it's eons better than the usually snowy north. In fact, if I had any motivation at all, I'd have gone for a ride even if it meant getting soaked.

However, I have said I was going to take a break from riding, and though I can feel my fitness literally leaving, and I can see the extra weight I've put on, I'm sticking to my guns. I figure I'll get back on the bike by the end of the year. Then I have 3 weeks to get ready for my first race. Nothing like planning ahead.

So what have I been doing otherwise? Well, I did go watch some trains and take pictures of a few downtown at Town Lake. So these are the two best shots I got.

Like I've said, I'm a train geek. In fact, I actually really enjoy chasing trains. It's relaxing, if you take the approach I have of getting something to drink and maybe snack on, set up somewhere, and wait. It's like fishing.

Other times, I like to follow and try to beat the same train so I can take a bunch of pictures of it. That's a challenge. Especially when you're just learning the light patterns, etc. But that's what life is, learning the patterns. And with that, I need to go finish what I was doing.

Saw Happy Feet

We saw Happy Feet last night and it was so much fun!!! Well, there were sad and scary parts, but overall it was too enjoyable. There's a few underlying themes, but you need to see the movie to find out.

Other than that, things are pretty good, including the weather. And the fact that there were 4 people I know personally at cyclocross nationals who either won their categories or placed on the podium. Maybe next year I can go, wherever that may be.

It's almost Christmas?

Really, it's hard for me to get in my head that Christmas is next week. I'm more used to what the locals call cold here in Austin as pleasant. I mean, 35 degrees at night is NOT cold for this time of year. In a year though, I'll be shivering right alongside them.

I've done not much but work and goof off lately. Which is funny in a way since my wife decided she no longer hadtime to blog anymore due to no time. Granted, we still have many things to put away, and several boxes to unpack. I should have tackled some of it today. Yet I didn't.

Instead, I indulged all my geeky and lazy instincts and went for a walk. A long one, but it was fun. Well, it wasn't that long, just down to the bookstore to read some and then back. But it was a refreshing and needed change of pace.

I haven't ridden my bikes since I last raced. I need to get back on as the first race of the season in on January 20th. Back up to Copperas Cove, which is good as it's the same course that was used for the State Championships. At least this course I'll know somewhat.

Like all people, I need to step away from things to refresh myself, and my bikes are no exception. So we've gone to friend's houses, San Antonio, and tried to relax. I won't go into boring details, but it's been busy in a different kind of way.

Also, I've been reaquainting myself with photography, which I love to death. Some examples of my work sans tripod on the riverwalk are included. This leads me to my inner geek surfacing.

Not only am I totally into picture taking, but I love trains. So, the other portion of my day was spent researching where the hot spots of train activity in Austin are. Now that I know, I have a plan to go picture taking on the next decent free day I have. Now aren't you glad you read this? LOL!!!

Happy Holidays if you don't hear from me before they arrive. Stay safe and enjoy all you have.

Simple

So I did my races. Saturday at the State Championships I dropped out, as I was having issues with my shifters and I was way too slow. Sunday I did two races, getting 5th and 11th. Respectable.

After a bit of confusion, as in the promoter had to change the race venue for Saturday, things went well. Sunday the race was in a park over by the airport, and it was a good course for me. Of course, something had to go wrong, and when I was putting an arm warmer on I punched myself in the mouth, arriving at the the line with a very bloody mouth and lip. But it's almost healed.

What struck me the most wasn't the racing, or the course, but the other people in the park. There was a family all bundled up with their little kids playing on the playground, and another family having a barbeque and riding their bikes around the park. I liked it.

It reminded me of when I was a kid and my parents would take us to the pool or the state park with a beach on a lake. It was cheap, and we could all hang out together. Also like when we'd sit on our dock at our house in the Adirondacks. We'd swim, fish, or just pass time. Simple, and it seems like such a world away.

I'm just old enough to remember the Adirondacks as a time capsule of the 50's. It was simpler up there, and slower. Now it feels different. It was an event to go up there, and due to speed limits and slow, twisty roads, it took forever. Now it's so accessible, it doesn't quite have that special feeling. Or it didn't, but since I'm 2000 miles away, it probably will next time I get there.

So I miss some of the simpler moments of my life, like watching freight trains go by along the Mohawk River, or eagerly anticipating the next issue of whatever train or car magazine I had a subscription to at the time. And maybe that's part of the problem with the present. We feel guilty for just watching a day go by, like we must be wasting it, when in reality we're doing what we should, enjoying it.

Expectations

Our own self image is a funny thing. If you were to meet me, you'd think I'm a somewhat happy fun loving person. A bit zany, too. Which is correct. However, we all have expectations. Some from other people, many we put upon ourselves. I know in high school all my teachers and relatives expected great things from me. In a conventional sense, I let them down. I didn't graduate college, find a cure, or make a huge difference in the world. I look at 16 years ago and how open the world seemed to me. Now it's a little less open, but more accessible. Figure that one out.

Looking at my life in an unconventional sense, I'd say I exceeded even the wildest expectations. I've had a life that could fill a book, and most people don't believe all the stuff I've done until they talk to my parents or see the pictures. It's kind of funny, I exceeded my own expectations when I raced this season, but fell short a year ago. I didn't win anything this year, but I was a force to be dealt with in many races, and after two more races this weekend, I'm free until January.

Another expectation is with my blog. I rarely get comments, and don't really expect to, but a few of you guys comment on a somewhat regular basis, and I'm always pleasantly surprised by it. I may even go and actually link to to those few faithful readers as a thank you. Don't expect it too soon, though, lol!!!

When I was a squad leader in the army I routinely felt I failed to live up to my expectations. Every time someone in my unit was wounded or killed, I felt like a failure. After years of reflection, I see I didn't fail myself or my squad, as I did my best and most of us beat the odds while we served together.

So what does this have to do with anything? Not much, just think back on your lives and really take an unbiased look. I know now I really didn't fail anyone but myself a few times, but that's ok. Usually I had way too high expectations to begin with.

158 and climbing

So this is post 158. Pretty cool. Especially since I was on a great pace until two weeks ago. Then we moved, my parents came for the better part of a week, and well, posting and email take a big back seat.

The holiday was great, I really enjoyed having my parents around. Plus our new apartment is coming along well. It feels like a home since we have a few extra rooms. It'll take a bit, but soon we'll be unpacked and settled.

What is going on? Not much. I work, I'm gaining weight, and I have a new project to tend to. My cyclocross bike needs to be reassembled, and the TX state championships are next week here in Austin at Zilker park. If you're nearby, and have some time to kill, swing by. I'm also racing Sunday at Moya park. How will I do? Ok, probably, but these two races are my cross season this year.

Ok, time to sift through my email. Then time to sift through boxes. Till then...

Fun and games

Been working and riding, nothing new there. Last night I did an informal race between our store in central Austin and the one up north where I work. It was cool, I bought some lights for my bike and a group of us rode down to the start. Then at about 845 we started the race. You could pick your own route, and I ended up with two guys from a competing shop. Actually, they got a gap on me through an intersection with traffic, but I chased them down.

A few miles from the end I just didn't quite have it, and I ended up fourth, as the guy who won took another route. Much faster, much more dangerous. But, I had a good time, then we had a party at our north store and I went home. I really enjoyed the night ride. It brought back memories of my 26 mile commute through most of Indianapolis when I lived there. There's something neat about riding in the night. Too bad I really don't know of anywhere to ride here at night safely by myself. I always enjoyed riding along Route 28A along the Ashokan reservoir back in NY during the summer when I couldn't sleep. Of course, I had an awesome set of lights for that, and I gave them away a few years ago.

We move shortly, and we have a new couch coming for it. I'm more relaxed than Lost, but I understand her anxiety. We'll let you know how it goes.

Quiet, Too Quiet, and Politicians Who Should Be

So I must say thanks to all who commented on my last post. Very interesting I thought. Now I have a few snippets of thought and observations.

First, it's funny how tastes change. I used to get all excited looking at sports cars and racing, as far back as I could remember. So much so that I actually raced cars and rebuilt them, too. I'm really glad I did it, but I specialized in vintage racing, so even with all the safety equipment installed, it wasn't that safe.

Well, tonight I was with Lost at the bookstore, and saw an issue of Octane Magazine from England. It had my all time favorite race car, a Ferrari 250 GTO on the cover. I got all the usual sensations: shortness of breath, tingling hands, and even could almost smell and hear the one I raced several times. I couldn't wait to leaf through the issue and devour all there was.

I leafed through, but about halfway I read a column I always enjoy, and it made me think. The short version is Niki Lauda had a huge almost fatal accident 30 years ago at Nurburgring Germany. He almost burned to death, and fortunately another two drivers stopped and one actually risked his life and got Niki out. He was quoted as saying he would have gotten Niki out or died trying, and his hands were so burned he basically ended his career.

It was at that moment I realized I have no passion to own or drive a vintage car again. It was risky, and I had a few accidents, but always went home with only bruises. Yes, it was fun driving multimillion dollar cars that weren't mine, and I had many great times. But I just have no desire to be involved anymore. Or even follow it. Funny how that works sometimes.

On to less thoughtful topics. I'm back on my bike again so I can lose the weight I've been slowly gaining. So keep it tuned here. Believe it or not, I'm about 175-180 lbs at 5'11". I should be about 169. At least I have all winter to work on eating better and staying fit.

Last Tuesday I rode 50 miles with my riding buddy from work, and she was thrilled because she had never ridden more than 50 miles before. Tomorrow we're going to fredericksburg to ride in the hills. Truth be told, I was hurting for a few days afterwards. Almost felt like my quads were bruised. How quickly we fall.

Today I rode the same route but it was much windier, and about 5 miles from the end I bonked. Big time. I just tried to keep an even pace and finally got to my car. On the way home I was enjoying the election signs all over. And here we go into the next topic I aim the crosshairs at.

First, some humor. A local sign says to elect some guy named Fleece. Think about it. Fleece. Like I'll have any confidence in him. Then I was looking at my hometown paper online. Not so long ago my father was one of the 9 city council members called Aldermen. He ran twice before being elected the third time. (It's a two year term.) When he went for reelection, a big mouthed moron beat him. People told my dad they didn't see his name in the paper enough, so he must not have been doing anything.

If they said he never helped them, he asked if they called him. No. Wrote a letter? No. Email? Uhh, no. Stopped him in the street? Nope. You get the idea. My father kept a log of every issue brought to his attention. In two years he had over 600 issues come up. As he said, each issue was at least a phone call to the proper department and then a return call to the constituent. I used to love how people would kind of slump down when they heard that.

Once the people of the neighborhood got fed up with the idiot who replaced my father, they asked me if he was going to run again. I told him his quote. "Screw them, they don't want me, I don't want this damn city." With that he and my mom sold the house and moved to Hilton Head, SC. And they're much happier.

The idiot is still in office, as no one ran against him the last two times. Two days ago his wife and him were front page news as she was arrested for threatening another woman who supposedly is having an affair with the idiot. Great choice the citizens of Kingston, NY made there.

I guess I get upset because I saw how much work my dad put into a part time elected position and the fact he actually wanted to make the city a better place. It just goes to show how if you do a good job in politics it gets you out of office, if you just get all kinds of press, no matter what kind, you're good to go. It's a sad state of affars this country is in when that's the case. Jayne Mansfield used to say "There's no such thing as bad publicity", and I think she'd be surprised just how true her quote is outside of showbiz 50 years later.

Weight and Five

So we all have our crosses to bear. Or, we all feel the weight of things we've done in the past. With that in mind, I was thinking about some stuff today while I enjoyed the sun and scenery on a 50 mile ride with a coworker. The ride was great, even if we did stray from the route and had to improvise a bit. But I got to see cattle, goats, horses, and best of all, Great Pyrenees dogs. I had one as a kid until I was 19, and they are my favorite dogs. Apparently they're really popular down here as herding dogs (their purpose) as I've seen them all over. Anyway...

On to more serious things. Sometimes I look back on things that have happened to me, but I can't dwell on it. I've seen the worst of people and the best. I've simultaneously taken lives and tried and sometimes did save some. I'll never forget certain incidents, or sleep like I did as a kid. But it's a path I chose, so I deal with it. Long story short, I'm moving on, so to speak. I can get stuck in a rut where I feel guilty and pissed off, etc. So how do I not? I realize I can't bury it, but I also know it needs to just get filed away, like when you'e havd a really bad day at the office or school or something. So I'm moving on down the road. I won't ever forget the battles, my friends who died, or the nightmarish reality of combat. But I'm not going to keep it at the front of my mindset, either.

Enough of that depressing topic. Two more and we're out of here. First, no one seems to comment on my blog much. Trust me, you'll never offend me unless it's a personal attack. Second, to close with, there's that new T Mobile 5 thing. So if you could have anyone from anytime on it, who would it be and why? Please, will someone please comment on my fuckin' blog???!!!??? Ok, this also assumes we have another 5 for our real lives, like relatives, spouses, etc.

My 5:
Julius Caesar. Super smart, great leader, somewhat ruthless.
Jayne Mansfield. Off the charts smart, driven, totally hilarious.
Stirling Moss. Arguably best race car driver ever. Neat character.
The Duke of Wellington. Anyone who shaped history like he did is a shoo in.
Terp and Prairie from my old unit (we'll assume the unit has a single address, as I'm making the rules) as they saved my life quite a few times, and I'd love to share what's gone in with the life they saved.

Let's hear yours. And Happy Halloween!!!!

So much to say, but I'm drawing a blank

Wow, I'm finally catching my breath. In the last year I've moved twice, gotten married, raced over 30 races, and started a new job, several times. So what's the scoop? Moving to Austin has been great. Everyone is cool, my job is great, Lost is wonderful, I prefer the weather mostly, and it feels like eons ago I was in NY. I only miss the mountains, and the leaves and crisp air at this time of year. But the next time (and the first for my wife) we get there, I'll appreciate it more.

Work is a bit slow this time of year, so I'll be getting ready for our move. I also have some neglected work on our bikes to do. This will do two things. Get the bikes back to 100% and use up some stuff in bags and boxes, thus less to move. Once in a great while my mind works efficiently.

So I haven't really posted too much lately. Well, this past Tuesday I went mountain biking in the greenbelt on a super high end bike from our rental fleet. It was a great 2 hours of fun, even if I had no clue what I was doing. But I didn't break anything on myself or the bike, so I'm pretty satisfied. Then my coworker and I ate at Shady Grove on the patio. That was really the excuse to ride, so we could justify all that heart stopping goodness.

Not much else to say, other than watching Youtube silliness a little. I think I could get into making film shorts again. Well, that would mean I'd need to get a camera for that kind of work, and some inspiration. Scratch that idea.

Time To Catch Up Though I Didn't Know I Was Behind

Been quite the interval of non posting, eh? Actually, I've been pretty busy. Let's ee, finished my road racing season, went to FL and met my mother in law, today I'm going mountain biking (yikes, on a $6000 bike from work) and it's the Smurf's 48th birthday. So, let's get going.

The Smurfs turn 48 today. We all loved them, I did a college paper on them being socialist at least, illustrating all the symbols. But I wasn't aware that the UN tapped into them for Unicef in Germany. This is pretty weird: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MAYrF1PDks

The trip to FL was great, just wished I had taken another day off so we all could have rested some at the beach. But Steph's mom is nice, our parents all liked each other, and I think they actually had too much fun together. Details are over at La Vida Loca, kids.

Today I'm mountain biking for the first time in years. Add to that I have a $6000 BMC mountain bike reserved for me at my job's downtown shop, and I'm excited. Hopefully nothing goes wrong, as I don't want to pay for anything. Plus I'm not sure how bad a mountain biker I am, so it'll be fun. A coworker named Aaron is going with me. It's really just an excuse for us to be able to grab a burger afterwards, but I'm looking forward to it.

I finished out my road racing season in style. Well, kind of. Almost. Maybe? It was wet, cool and a bit windy. I rode really well, especially since I didn't have a team. I had to ride through the grass off the road twice to avoid crashes, and the second time a few guys and I really had to work to chase back on only about 4 or 5 miles from the finish. That left me with not a lot of time to recover and work my way up through the field. Then I messed up my positioning and got boxed in out of the last corner, so I ended up 29th overall, finishing with the lead group. Considering about 100 started, I did ok.

Now I want to get my cyclocross bike here so I can do one, maybe two races and the state championships. Of course, moving into a new place soon will be a fun project, too.

I needed this

I saw the results were online finally for the Friday night races. Well, partial results. But as I scrolled down I noticed my name was listed as finishing third. In a race I had withdrawn from!! I needed the laugh.

Yesterday was one of those days when everything goes wrong. But it's over, and I need to get over it. I scoped out Sunday's course. I think I'm getting burned out, and need to just do this race and relax for a bit. It's my last road race, so I'm going to try and have fun with it.

Then I can concentrate on getting my cyclocross bike from my parent's house to here, and hopefully doing a few races. My big thing is to do the state championships on 12/2 at Zilker Park right here in Austin. Sooo, I expect my loyal legion of fans to be there. That would be my wife and our friends the T and M. I carelessly forgot to mention in my last post that they were very supportive (and vocal) Friday night. If I'm lucky it'll be raining and in the 40's the day of the championships.

Well, off to get ready for work.

Friday Night

Well, even though there was some mass confusion and lack of organization, the races Friday night were pretty good. Aside from the 2 hour delay in getting things started, I had a good time. I really enjoyed it, even if I didn't do as well as I should have.

The course was around the 2nd St area of downtown Austin, and about a third of the course was pretty rough pavement. I got in the lead group from the gun, but hit a hole really hard, and that in turn caused my sensor for my computer to move, which then caused my magnet to get jettisoned out of my wheel. In determining what if any damage was done to my bike, since it was making a horrific noise, I dropped off the back of the group. Stupid move. This left me in no man's land between the chase group and the break.

I did a few laps until I was caught, then hung in with the chase. Too bad no one was in the mood to chase, so we kept losing time. On the last lap I just missed a crash, and that put me pretty far back in the pack, so I think I ended up in the top 30. However, staying upright and not getting lapped was a major accomplishment. So I now know the course and what to expect. I'm ok with getting in the top half of the race all thing considered. I just made two mistakes. One, I let the lead group go, two, I wasn't in the front of the chase group early enough, and that cost me a decent finish. Besides the fact I also wa spushed wide on Colorado St and my right hand hit the rear view mirror of a parked car that wasn't removed didn'r help me either.

I lined up for my second race, and it was faster. A few laps in I hit a hole and blew my front tire out around the next turn. I got a wheel at the pits, got back in, and hit the same hole (it was very dark in that corner) again and something didn't feel right. So I bagged it and ended the race. Besides, I had to race the next day.

Now, I love to race, but ususally there isn't too much in terms of spectators. Friday night was the best race of the year. Nothing like racing in front of a huge crowd. Now if only they could get the crowds to the size of the Chris Thater Races in Binghamton... But I had a bunch of coworkers come cheer me on, and that was really cool. Hopefully next year I do better.

Saturday I drove up to Bryan TX for the age graded State Championship road race. I was in the 30+, and there were 25 of us. 66 miles of pure hell. I rode pretty well, and since I was the lowest category there, I was happy. Really, I was. I was in the lead group, and then I just imploded. The night before, the speed, it all took it's toll, and I just couldn't pedal any more. So with 10 miles to go I turned around, as it was only 3 miles to the car that way. Once back at my car, I stripped down to just my racing shorts and walked across the lot to the beach and fell into Lake Bryan for a bit. That felt really nice.

So I have one more race of the year, and that's the state championships for categories in Copperas Cove. I'm looking forward to some redemption, and I'm looking forward to some time off.

Friday Night Downtown

Ok, I'm racing Friday night downtown around the 2nd St District. Two races, so come on down if you have time. Basically it all starts at about 530. See you there. My boss got on the phone today so I'll be racing in my shop's jersey. Something about the fact he wanted to see our jersey "in the top ten for a change". Pretty funny.

Did the Tuesday Nighter again, and got about sixth. Lance Armstrong rode it, too, and it was pretty fun. Well, fast and punishing fun. We talked a little bit at one point, and then the end came too soon. Good night and see you at 2nd and Lavaca.

Just my ramblings for another day

So my new bike is awesome. It's lighter, stiffer, more comfortable, faster, but not better, just different. Today in a little while I'm going to get my final fit to dial it in, then it's time for the first race on it, the famed Tuesday nighter I prattle on about. I'm excited.

All this got me to thinking about stuff. I realized I really enjoy the planning, and preparation for races, rides, building a bike. Just like I love to dream about one day having some room to build a model railroad. The execution of the plan isn't always as fun as coming up with one in the first place. Make any sense? If a plan goes perfectly, it's almost an anticlimax. There has to be some type of snag, a certain level of stress and urgency for me to really appreciate the experience.

When I go to a race, I like to get there really early so I can register, warm up, scout out the course, and try to relax. But even if I have a gameplan, it usually doesn't coincide with anyone else, so it's back to improvising, which is exciting. At the end of the day, if it works out pretty well, I relish the moment. If not, I analyze it all.

When I was in the Army, I really enjoyed the planning and details of an operation. To be honest, from the moment we walked out onto the apron to get on our choppers until we started taking rounds from the enemy, it is one of the most exhilerating adrenaline highs known. I actually enjoyed it. Those last minutes of doublechecking everything in flight and mentally preparing myself for what lay ahead are some of my favorite memories.

Don't get me wrong, I want to forget many things, but just those few minutes of solitude when each of us was quiet, doing what we had to do mentally were intense. We bonded without doing anything. Then we bonded through action minutes later.

So maybe I'm a thrill junkie. But so far, my racing is the one thing that gets me closest to that feeling of peace and calm. Funny how the most intense feeling of it was from when I was in a combat zone in a war.

The King is Dead, Long Live the King

So, I finally retired my beloved Horse Tuesday. In his place I built up a Specialized S-Works Tarmac. A bit lighter, a whole lot faster. But this is Horse's "obituary":

Tuesday, September 26
At approximately 3pm the Schwinn Paramount OS "Horse" was laid to rest, having been deactivated from frontline race duty after nearly 16 seasons and 132,000 miles. Born in August of 1990 in Waterford, WI, Horse was rushed into service in May of 1991. For the next 16 seasons he competed in races from Maine to Missouri, Canada to Texas.

Deciding to give his faithful steed a rest, Horse's owner Mike will make sure that Horse is rejuvenated at his birthplace to like new condition. "His paint is a bit faded, and there's some rust here and there, but when he returns, Horse will be free to go out on fun rides, and not worry about ice and ran and crashing like he has all these years. I can't express how close we are, as he's shared all my triumphs and failures in this sport. It's the end of an era for me, and I am happy to have had such a reliable, potent ally all this time. I'll miss him, but his time has come. Of course, should the need arise, I'm sure Horse will be ready to do battle once he's back from his restoration."

Horse 8/90-9/06 May all roads be sunny, the air warm, and the wind at our backs when we ride again, buddy. You served me well and we made each other proud.

So there you have it. I finally retired my signature green machine. Now I'm on a less distinctive bike, but I'm figuring out ways to make it stick out. Now if I can only dial it in by nest Friday when I have three, yes three hour long races in the evening. The 2nd Street district will never be the same...

Oh, totally unrelated. If you're a proponent of windpower, go read the current issue of Adirondack Life magazine. Has some good articles and pictures on the subject. That's all I have for social commentary.

The King is Dead, Long Live the King!!!!!

Wish all Mondays were like this

Today was perfect in big ol' TX today. All of it. I went on a fun, relaxing and slow paced ride with two coworkers today. It rocked. My wife wasn't exactly thrilled I was abandoning her at 830am to meet two female coworkers to ride, but I digress.

We went to Bastrop State Forest, and it was effin great!!!! The park was almost empty, we rode on pine tree lined roads filled with the scent of pine needles, and the weather was perfect. Totally perfect. It reminded me of home, with the roads being narrow, no houses, lots of trees, and constant up a steep hill, top out, and drop right down again. We saw deer, and squirrels, and not much else.

I have to say in terms of terrain and relaxing, it was the best ride I've done yet in TX. It makes me want to hunt out places to ride that are within an hour or so of town to drive to. I really liked it that much. All three of us did, and we're thinking of trying to make it a weekly work thing so our other coworkers can go.

Most times I ride I ride alone, and I don't focus on anything but the ride. today reminded me that sometimes you just gotta relax, and listen to the wind in the treetops. By riding with people not as fast as me, I just enjoyed the ride. Like I did when I first moved here with Lost. I enjoy the easy rides for a change of pace, and it helps my body, too.

After the ride we had to eat, and we ate on the deck of a place called the Roadhouse. Great food and very reasonable. Then we returned to Austin. A perfect way to spend a day off.

So it got me to wondering why I ride. For fun? Fitness? Or is it because I love to race, and I have to? Probably all of the above, but it got me to thinking of places I want to ride and where I want to return to ride. The list is too long for here, but it would be a fun way to spend a vacation with Lost. Or I could ride and she could tell me all about the great deals she got in the outlets and local shops of wherever we visit...

I thought this was the way to nirvana

So, lots of interesting stuff showing up on the news lately. We watch more tv. We are getting obese. There's a connection. There are people claiming that "Big Oil" gets tax breaks, and kick backs. Blah blah. Take a look at big oil. Most of our cost is taxes. So why is the government going to reduce what gives it solvency? Riddle me that, Batman.

Alternative energy. Yes, wind power is a good concept. But do you know how many windmills it takes to generate a kilowatt? And, how many of the proponents of wind power want a windmill farm in sight of their (chosse one) home, office, city, etc? Those things are ugly!!!

Enough pontificating. Want to solve the energy problem and oil prices? Build a new refinery. Non have been built in 26, yes 26 years!!! So when Katrina knocked a bunch of production offline, we have price spikes, because the other refineries still working in the country are running at full capacity. Doesn't take a genius to figure this out.

But a more permanent solution would be to have people use mass transit, carpool, ride bikes, or walk. Wait, that might mean some type of effort must be extended, so trash those ideas.

Healthcare? HA!!! Why must I pay the same rates at my job as a smoker? Why not make it like car insurance? Better health, lower premiums. This all gets me aggravated.

I actually had some type of witty post in my head, but I lost it, as usual. Guess I'll just go do some laundry and hope for a return to creativity.

Why do we feel this way sometimes?

I just got in from work and decided to check my email. Long story short, someone I dated years ago is on the same email list as I am for cycling. Though we aren't really friends I read her post and was saddened by the death of her oldest stepson. I never met the kid (he was 18) and I barely know her husband, but I couldn't help but feel bad for them. Funny how something like this casts all the animosity aside. Not like we'll ever say more than hi if we ever cross paths, but it puts it into perspective what a waste of time disliking someone is after they're out of your life.

So strange. However, on to more exciting things. Well, to me anyway. I am slowly getting my fat self back into shape, as in October I have a bevy (how long I've waited to use that word in a post you can only imagine) of races. Not just the Tuesday Nighter and the Thursday night crits, oh, no, there are also some bona fide, mega-important races. I know you've got the whole seat, but you'll only need the edge...

It all starts off on Friday, October 6th. That spectacular evening at 520pm I line up for my first race of the evening in downtown Austin, in the 2nd St District. @nd and Lavaca is the area of the finish, though I have yet to find out the entire course. Later on at about 8 I do my 2nd race of the night. Both are 1 hour and both promise to be fast and fun. Hopefully I can get a bunch of coworkers to cheer me on. So mark your calendars, kids.

Then the next day I have the TX Road Championships. This will be hard, as it's age based, so I'll be in the 30 plus group. A bit daunting. Finally, on the 15th I have the TX Road Championships but it's done by racing category. There I have a slight chance. Very slight.

So, if you want to get sunburned or wet, go to a road race. However, if you're in the Austin area and want to see fast racing and be able to eat and drink alcohol while doing so, go to the Amli Downtown Criterium. That's it. Oh, and here's a pic of me suffering at Columbus, TX again. Just found it the other night.

Shut up and do something

I'm a bit pissed. Let me get the most aggravating bit out of the way. Why is it that colored people get all pissed when someone refers to them as a nigger, then they turn around and call another black person a nigger? What isn't firing in their brains?

Here's an example. Kanye West has his song Goldigger, and uses the term "broke niggers" in it. Kanye, if you want to be respected when you open your mouth about politics, don't use the word nigger. It defeats your credibility. This leads to a much larger issue.

Until colored people stop using the term nigger, they won't get the respect they crave and deserve. Why respect people who freely use a term that is one of the most derisive in our language towards them? You don't hear Afghanis calling each other caffers, do you? Leonard Pitts has touched on this issue in the past. If you stop using nigger, do you suddenly sell out? If you do sell out, is that wrong to get a better life, home, etc? I don't get it. So I guess it's ok for Poles to call each other Polack, Ukrainians to use mongol (centuries old derogatory term) and the list goes on.

If that's the case, and it's accepted among the people it's directed to and coming from, why can't another race use those words? Why can't I use the word nigger to refer to a colored person? I mean, they do it to each other! So why get upset if someone from another race uses it? It must be ok, right? Oh, wait, I'm white, so it must mean I'm a racist, but if I were colored, it just means I'm colored. Makes perfect sense. To an idiot.

I raced this past Tuesday night. It was fast, I enjoyed it, and it rained. Rain means roads like ice here in TX, so a few miles from the end when my bike started to try and get out from under me, I backed off a bit and finished about 5 seconds behind the lead group of five. Not bad.

But the real point is a guy who was with us had a prosthetic adaptor on his left leg. It was from the knee down, and was a titanium or steel rod, with a plate on the bottom, and his cleat mounted to that. He was very fast, and a good rider. Turns out he had his leg blown off in Iraq, and was now out of the Army. He was upbeat, not bitter about it, and moving on. He was happy to be there, rain and all. He stayed in the main group once the rain hit, but I was impressed. At one point I put my hand on hs back to help him keep from letting a gap form ahead of him up a hill. He was upset, but I told him it was easier for me to do that than to use a bunch of energy to get around him, and I'd do it no matter who it was so it wouldn't upset the flow of the paceline. Later he gave me a shove and we both laughed.

This guy has every reason to be bitter, but he's not. He's got a lot of things to deal with and to overcome in the future. Next time you get pissed look at what your problem is and put it into perspective.

I'm actually thinking for once!!!!

So Anna Nicole Smith's 20 yr old son was found dead. Weird. Of an apparent heart attack. Very odd. However, lest we get too giddy that this genetic strain be stopped, she has another child. So close... Seriously, though it is a tragedy. But it's almost like a Greek melodrama with her. At least with a Greek tragedy the show actually ends.

Let's see, Ohio beat UT this weekend. Personally, I can care less about football. But it sounds like everyone behaved, and enjoyed the game, so that's a good thing. Besides, now that UT is #8, if they can win a national championship it really would be something special. A bit of the underdog complex there. I like seeing the champion in any sport have to struggle a bit. It humanizes them, makes it more believable. Truth be told, I'm a huge fan of Lance Armstrong, but his last Tour performance was so dominating, it was kind of boring. He never really had to rally when the chips were down, because they never were.

So, with that segue, let me address some things baout the current state of cycling. I have found myself somewhat accepting that many top cyclists cheat with banned substances. Surprisingly, I almost don't care. This year the Tour was the most exciting in years, definitely the most exciting since 1989. Who's to blame? Us, the public. Like 10,000 Maniacs song Candy Everybody Wants, the athletes give us what we want. Drama, excitement, records being broken. Look what happened to baseball when the home run craze was going on. Same with football. Winning isn't enough for the public anymore. Winning with a superhuman performance is. Then we look away and say how shameful the behavior is, but we are the ones who brought the behavior to begin with. More drama is more money.

Even in a poor sport as cycling, where the season is 10 long months from early February through November, the drugs make more exciting racing. That means more fans, more sponsor money. Odd that cycling is the only truly free sport in the world. No one has to pay to see a race. More odd is the fact that in the ProTour, the top level of the sport, the major leagues, if you will, has a base salary for a cyclist of $38,000 for 2007. You read it right. A little over three grand a month to travel all over the world, live from a duffel bag, and spend an average of 30 hours a week on a bike in all weather. In a sport where a 2 year contract is still rare, it's all about what have you done for me lately. And the drugs ensure that something is done for many racers.

Last topic for tonight. It's 5 years since 9/11. We all know and remember. I'm ok with it, but last night we watched the documentary on CBS. I've seen quite a bit, and not much compares to my tours in the Army. But what gets to me is the fear in the eyes of those firefighters and police, and when the radio traffic got crazy, I could feel it. When things are quiet on the freqs, the situation is under control. When everyone's jamming the waves trying to get through, it's not good. For me, hearing the chatter and seeing the looks on the faces choked me up, for I could empathize. The men were scared, the officers were worried, and the anguish they felt will never go away. Part of me died all over again when I saw that, and I know those guys would give anything to get rid of that anguish.

Five years On

Where were you on 9/11? I was 95 miles north, in Kingston, NY. A friend's brother was in the Pentagon when it got hit. I knew a person in the WTC who was killed. Everyone from my area knew at least someone who was.

Why did it happen? Well, there are many reasons as well as theories. Basically, it was a long list of factors. No one is entirely to blame, no one is free of blame. The CIA was hunting terrorists in the 90's, especially after the embassy bombings in Africa. Then the funding was cut, and the programs died. More of the same followed.

I think it's unreasonable for the American public to think that we do and should follow the rules when we have terror suspects in custody. I mean, if someone is captured in a firefight with US forces, and has tapes and letters connecting them to a terrorist organization, then why not torture them? They'd do the same to us. You need to bring a gun to a knife fight is all I'm saying.

Oh, and to anyone who thinks we didn't shoot down the plane over PA, examine the evidence. Find out what happens when a plane depressurizes quickly, or ask yourself how an F-16 couldn't get to the plane in time from the DC area after it was scrambled. Do the math, and then read the phone transcripts from the passengers who called the ground. Connect it all together and ask yourself what happened. An F-16 at nearly full throttle could easily have vectored in.

However, what have we learned? This is becoming a religious war. It will take generations to end if the hatred can be bred out. Don't hold your breath.

Shhh, it's a secret

Ok, so I have both my bikes back together. Finally. Horse is back up and running, and run he did tonight. Too bad I let him down. I went to the Thursday night crit series here in town. I did my first race, and it was fast, but not too bad. Since I hadn't ridden at all since Sunday, I was happy to stay with the field.

In the end I finished somwhere from probably 15th to 20th. Then I did my second race and it was about the fastest race I've done in a few years. I dropped off the pace about halfway through. But at least it was good training, I felt ok other than a lack of miles, and I made a few new friends. Plus I got to feel out horse after a rebuild, and I learned the course. So next time I have a Thursday off, I'll be there.

I ended up meeting a guy from Syracuse, NY, and even funnier is the fact that he's best friends with an ex-girlfriend's husband. Small world. So we exchanged email addresses so I can be kept informed of all the local hot spots to race at, etc. Did I mention that there's a free barbecue afterwards? Yes, there is. So I'm all happy about that.

Speaking of food, I'm beginning the cutback of food I need to do, and am going to try and implement a somewhat structured training regimen so I can not embarass myself. At least I haven't had to deal with the dreaded "I remember you from way back, you were really good, what happened?" but I'm sure that question is skulking about.

Do I have anything else to add? Not much, except that I've dealt with some UT students lately and they need to get over their egos and the notion their school is as good as an ivy league school. It isn't. It's a great, well respected university, no doubt, but not ivy league. Funny how if you check out any UT student's blog or hear them speak, they always preface sentences with "Here at UT", or "At UT", etc. Not "At school today" or "In class". To be honest, most people and places care less where you go to school, they just want to see you can play the game, pay yuour dues, and get a diploma, to prove you work well with others.

Lastly, before I left I had a fascinating discussion with a rep for a sports drink company. Oddly enough, I understood all of what he was saying, even with the organic chemistry, nutrion physiology, and other scientific stuff. Maybe our brains change as we do, and what was once abstract is now easy to understand to us. Just don't ask me to multiply or divide fractions, but if you need a drag coefficient and torque and power curves, I'm your guy.

Oh, and my parents celebrated their 40th anniversary this past Monday. It's an achievement that's definitely worth noting in my mind, and I'm happy and proud. Later.

Expectations

Hmmm, isn't it funny how many times reality is different from expectations? The story of my life. Being married has far exceeded all my expectations. Austin is better than I expected, but things like traffic and the lack of truly quiet rural roads anywhere near the city is a mild letdown. But I've found other places to ride that make up for it.

So we shift to my latest project. I tore down Horse, and used the shifters from him to build up my Specialized Allez. So after all is said and done, Horse weighed 21.25 lbs in his last state, which is quite heavy. One of the guys at work rides a BMC which is 14.5 lbs., so you can see how much of a disadvantage I was at. Anyway, I spent a lot of time on this other bike, Jack O Lantern. Being aluminum, I thought it would be quite light. Today I rode it to work and weighed it, and it weighs 20.25 lbs. What !!?!! Ok, I can get the weight down some by throwing a carbon seatpost in, a lighter seat, a carbon stem and bars, but after that it's pretty much impossible to lighten this bike much more.

Now Horse is on the stand to be rebuilt in a lighter version. We'll see how that goes. I really should be more concerned with getting down to the weight I was in late May than trying to pare off weight from my bikes. Cheaper, too.