Just my ramblings for another day

So my new bike is awesome. It's lighter, stiffer, more comfortable, faster, but not better, just different. Today in a little while I'm going to get my final fit to dial it in, then it's time for the first race on it, the famed Tuesday nighter I prattle on about. I'm excited.

All this got me to thinking about stuff. I realized I really enjoy the planning, and preparation for races, rides, building a bike. Just like I love to dream about one day having some room to build a model railroad. The execution of the plan isn't always as fun as coming up with one in the first place. Make any sense? If a plan goes perfectly, it's almost an anticlimax. There has to be some type of snag, a certain level of stress and urgency for me to really appreciate the experience.

When I go to a race, I like to get there really early so I can register, warm up, scout out the course, and try to relax. But even if I have a gameplan, it usually doesn't coincide with anyone else, so it's back to improvising, which is exciting. At the end of the day, if it works out pretty well, I relish the moment. If not, I analyze it all.

When I was in the Army, I really enjoyed the planning and details of an operation. To be honest, from the moment we walked out onto the apron to get on our choppers until we started taking rounds from the enemy, it is one of the most exhilerating adrenaline highs known. I actually enjoyed it. Those last minutes of doublechecking everything in flight and mentally preparing myself for what lay ahead are some of my favorite memories.

Don't get me wrong, I want to forget many things, but just those few minutes of solitude when each of us was quiet, doing what we had to do mentally were intense. We bonded without doing anything. Then we bonded through action minutes later.

So maybe I'm a thrill junkie. But so far, my racing is the one thing that gets me closest to that feeling of peace and calm. Funny how the most intense feeling of it was from when I was in a combat zone in a war.